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Day 99 (6/17): Poop Alert!!

I’m not telling…

Yes, a poop ALERT – this is day 5 since my last poop.  Did I poop today?  Read on.

For the first time in over a week, I actually slept through the night (pretty much defined as the point at which whoever wakes up to feed me doesn’t go back to sleep).  Dad got up at 4:30 and gave me a bottle.  I fell back asleep until 6:00, whcn I got up to eat and then I ate again at 7:00.  Get used to it, Mom.  I’m full time eatin’ from here on out. 

I slept at until 10, when I got up to eat.  Now, here’s where I pooped.  More impressive than my poop, though, is Uncle Danny’s description of his role in my pooping, which he claims to have “instigated.”  Uncle Danny “was the offensive coordinator; Maggie was the quarterback; [Mom] was the receiver who got destroyed in the end zone.”  Huh?  In short, Uncle Danny cheered me on, I did the pooping, and Mom did the cleaning.  Way to pass the buck, Uncle Danny.

Mom gave me a bath right after the “long bomb.”  And for the rest of the day I barely slept — only 1.5 hours in total between 11:00 am and bedtime.  I took a bunch of little cat naps – most not lasting even 5 minutes – at the end of which I would wake up happy and cooing.  Definitely a far cry from yesterday’s disaster.

A/C has been excited about having Patsy’s Pizza for a while.  Dad wasn’t feeling well and had an interview about the launch of a new website, so Mom and I walked up to 74th street and picked up the pizza.  And then, OH MY GOSH: Mom left me with a stranger!

That’s right!  There are stairs going up to Patsy’s that my stroller could not scale.  No one who worked at Patsy’s would help Mom carry my stroller in.  Nor would they bring the pizza out to Mom.  So, what could Mom do?  Well, have no fear, an old woman was near.  An elderly octogenarian lady — whose top speed, were she to try to “run” away might be 10 steps per minute — offered to watch me while Mom went in and paid for the pizza.  Mom thought about it, looked her up and down, surveyed the scene, and pulled the trigger.  She walked backward up the stairs, never taking her eyes off me.  She signed the credit card receipt blind and grabbed whatever food the lady handed her.  Within a moment she was galloping back down the steps to reposses me.  That was awesome.

My turn for a manicure.

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